A Soldier's Roots Read online

  “And since when do you take random selfies?”

  “Since now?” My phone goes off at that exact second, and she knows I sent that picture to someone.

  Wyatt: The light that makes my day brighter.

  I have no idea what he means, but he makes me smile even bigger. That is the sweetest thing he has ever said to me.

  “Wow, they must have liked that picture by the smile on your face.”

  I clear my throat and put my phone face down on the table. I start to say something, try to defuse this, or change the subject. The waitress saves me from stumbling over my words.

  Our food arrives, and we both dig in with a comfortable silence. Elena keeps glancing at my phone then back at me, I’m hoping her stare down will make me spill. I’m just not ready to talk about it yet. How can I talk about something that I haven’t figured out myself?

  We both finish up, paying our tab and head to the car. After buckling up, she calls Lucas to let him know we are getting back on the road. As soon as she hangs up and I start to pull out of the parking lot my phone goes off. I stop and check it before I pull onto the highway and my heart skips.

  Wyatt: Have a safe trip, Princess. Would you call me when you make it there, so I know you're safe?

  Geez, what is he doing to my insides? If he keeps this up, I will be a big puddle of mush by the time I get home.

  Me: Thank you and I think I can manage that. Have fun working on the ranch. Talk to you soon.

  I slid the phone into my purse and pull onto the highway. We are only back on the highway for thirty minutes before Elena is turning down the radio and breaking my silence.

  “You’re really not going to say anything?”

  “Say anything about what?” I try playing dumb. Knowing that won't work with Elena. I don’t care how long we spent apart; she still knows me better than anyone and can read me like a book.

  “You do know you only get those eyes for one person.”

  I give her a sideways look. “What eyes?” I ask.

  “You know. Those cartoon hearts in your eyes right now.” I huff out a laugh and try to ignore her.

  “Okay, fine. You don’t want to talk about it right now. I get it, but when you’re ready, I'm here.” Elena turns the music back up and starts singing along.

  I send a smile her way telling her thanks, and we continue our long drive to Seattle.

  The trip is long but fun, and we spent most of it goofing off. The drive here was gorgeous, I’m really glad I decided to come. Not that Elena would have let me say no. The house we are pulling up to is stunning, it’s Elena’s aunt and uncles. It’s a huge two-story stone house that sits right on the lake.

  As we step out of the car, I stretch my muscles and see Grace and James come out to greet us.

  “How was you drive, girls?” Grace asks as she hugs us both.

  “Long,” Elena laughs.

  “Let me get your bags, and you girls rest before your long shopping day.” James, Elena's uncle, smiles at us.

  We both thank him and follow them inside. They show us around the house and to our rooms. This house is amazing. With a modern look and style that looks like they paid someone to design it. Everything is sleek with stainless steel appliance. Each of our rooms are done as guest rooms that are modestly furnished. Mine and Elena's room are right next to each other.

  After James puts our bags in our rooms, Grace tells us to freshen up, and as soon as we are ready, we will go pick Aubrey up.

  “I’m going to call Lucas and change my clothes, meet in the kitchen in twenty?”

  “Sounds good,” I say walking into the room.

  Sitting on the bed I take my phone out and send a text to mom and dad telling them we made it, and I would call when we leave in the morning. They send back a ‘be safe, and I love you’ text. Then I decide, do I call Wyatt or just send him a quick text. I go with the latter.

  Me: Made it.

  I feel like a jerk, the text is short, and I know he will see it as a blow off. After asking me to call, not text. I set the phone on the bed and make my way to my bags. As I reach down to get a change of clothes my phone starts ringing.

  Chapter 10

  Sarah

  I’m staring down at my phone like it might reach out and bite me. Do I answer, or do I let it go to voicemail? Why does everything have to be so difficult with him, it’s not like I can blame him for it, it’s all in my head. The decision to take a chance on someone that has the power to destroy me completely. Not something my heart or my head are taking lightly right now.

  I stand there trying to make a choice for so long it goes to voicemail anyway. My shoulders relax just a little, but I feel a little guilty for ignoring him. Why am I doing this to myself? I feel like I am slowly going crazy, questioning every move I make when it comes to Wyatt.

  I turn to head back to my bag, and my phone starts ringing again. Crap. Just answer the phone, Sarah. Stop being such a coward. I tell myself, trying to give myself a mental pep talk.

  “Hello,” I say tentatively.

  “So, are you back to ignoring me?” Wyatt asks.

  “You should know.” I regret it as soon as it leaves my mouth.

  “Ouch. I guess I deserve that.”

  “No, I’m sorry. It was a long drive. And honestly, I don’t know what this is Wyatt.” I go with the truth; I really don’t know what this is or where this is going.

  “This is one friend calling another to see how their trip was.”

  “Right, friend,” I say with a bite to my ton. “Look, Wyatt, I have to change and get ready to go shopping. I made it safe, you got your phone call, so bye friend.” The word ‘friend’ comes out dripping in sarcasm.

  “Sarah, come on, don’t be like that.” He sounds upset that I don’t want to talk to him.

  “I can’t do this with you, Wyatt. I don’t want to have this conversation over the phone.” I don’t want to have this conversation at all. I just want things to go back to the way they were. Wyatt was ignoring me, I knew where I stood, and my head wasn’t all over the place.

  “We are going to have this talk, Sarah. But you're right. This is not the way it should go. Have lunch with me tomorrow?”

  “Can’t,” I say, giving him no explanation.

  “Okay, then dinner?” Wyatt tries again.

  “Can’t.”

  “Come on Sarah, throw me a bone.” It sounds a little like Wyatt is pleading. I’ve never heard Wyatt beg, ever.

  “I’m not sure when we will be home tomorrow, and I have to get ready for work on Monday. Maybe another time, Wyatt.” I start to pull the phone away and hang up, but Wyatt is not giving up.

  “Okay, princess. I'll let you get to your dress shopping, but just know this is far from over and we will have this talk, as soon as that sweet little ass is back in Eureka.” I gasp, not knowing how to respond.

  “Bye, Sarah.” I don’t say anything I just look down at my phone in shock.

  Did he really just say that?

  Ten minutes later I am changed and downstairs ready to go. Still a mess from the phone call with Wyatt. Elena walks into the kitchen shortly after I do, and we are heading to Grace’s car.

  “Aubrey is going to meet us there,” she says before we pull away from the house.

  The drive to the dress store is nice. Seattle is so different from our small town in Montana. The buildings here look like they could touch the sky. There are so many people, and the traffic is insane. It’s a little sad that I’ve never been to a big city like this. The farthest I have been from home was for college, and that was only a little ways away.

  We pull up to a beautiful store that looks way out of my price range. Grace insists that she is paying, and Elena is to pick out whatever dress she wants. As I get out of the car, I see a beautiful redhead standing beside a car, smiling our way. That must be Aubrey.

  “Chica, how I have missed that face.” She gives Elena a big hug.

  “I miss you too hooker,” Elena sa
ys.

  Aubrey hugs Aunt Grace then turns to me. I hold out my hand to shake hers, but she pulls me into a hug too. I look over at Elena and laugh, she just rolls her eyes.

  “Aubrey, this is Sarah. Sarah, this is Aubrey. Aubrey is very affectionate,” Elena says using finger quotations at very affectionate.

  “Sarah, I do believe she just called me a slut.” Aubrey winks at me.

  “If the shoe fits wear it,” Elena tells her.

  We all start laughing and then Aubrey sobers up and gets a serious look on her face.

  “I really have missed you, Chica, and I’m sorry I missed your wedding shower. I feel like such an ass.” Elena waves a hand at her and pulls her in for another hug.

  I can’t help the ping of jealous that hits me in the chest. They have a bond that Elena and I don’t have anymore, and we may never get it back.

  We all spend the next few hours trying on dresses. Aubrey and Elena give each other a hard time like this is their norm. Grace found her dress first, and now she’s sitting back laughing at their antics drinking the wine they brought us. Elena hasn’t touched hers, and I’m the only one that noticed and the only one that knows why. Or at least I thought I was.

  “Can we get a bottle of water for the bride to be?” Grace asks the sales lady.

  Maybe I’m not the only one that knows about the little baby surprise.

  We try on a few more dresses, but I am stuck in my own head. I feel a little out of place. I have never seen this side of Elena. Throwing insults back and forth and making jokes. I can see how close Aubrey and her are. I also can’t stop thinking about Wyatt and the phone call.

  What am I going to do? I want to talk to him and see how he feels, see what this is and where he thinks this is going. Is this even a this? Wow, I sound crazy, and I’m starting to make absolutely no sense. This is what he does to me, has me slowly unraveling over him. I can see where this would go if I let him into my heart any more than he already is.

  I keep telling myself this is Wyatt playing games, that he’s really not interested in me. But I just can't see him doing all this just for fun, throwing away his and Lucas’s friendship just to get a good laugh. Or to see how far I would let him go.

  My mind is running with different reasons this could all be a game. Except every time one runs through my head, I feel stupid for even thinking it. None of them end well for him. If he is leading me on just to get in my pants or playing some game, he will lose his best friend.

  My brother would kill him, heck he might kill him if he finds out his best friend kissed me at the wedding shower and has been texting and calling me. I know Lucas loves Wyatt like a brother, but I know he would not be okay with him and me.

  What am I doing? There is no me and him, so why am I even thinking about it.

  “You are awful quiet over there, Sarah?” Elena says pulling me out of my tailspin.

  “Just listing.” I give her my best smile.

  “We should play a game.” Aubrey chimes in.

  “Oh, God. This should be interesting.” Elena rolls her eyes.

  “Come on, Chica, it will be fun.” Aubrey winks at me again. “Craziest sex you’ve ever had?”

  I do not want to play this game.

  “I’ll go first,” Aubrey says. “Do you remember Cole?” she says to Elena.

  “Was he before the TA?” Elena is doing a spin looking at the dress she has on.

  “No, he was after the guy in our complex, Matt or Mark, hell I can’t remember his name.” Aubrey just waves her hand like it’s nothing. I stand there wide-eyed looking at Elena wondering: is she for real?

  “Told you she’s a total slut.”

  “Not a slut, just a dick connoisseur.” Aubrey thrust her hips, and I know my face is bright red.

  “Potato, potatoe.” Is Elena’s only response.

  “As I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted.” Aubrey sticks her tongue out at Elena. “Cole asked me if he could invite a friend over.” She wiggles her eyebrows at us.

  “You didn’t?” Elena screams at her.

  “I did,” Aubrey laughs.

  “Did what?” I ask them feeling a little stupid.

  “She had a threesome,” Grace tells me.

  I look back at Aubrey in total awe of this woman. I can’t even have sex with one person let alone two. Wow, I feel pathetic right about now.

  “What about you, Grace,” Aubrey asks.

  My head snaps to Grace, surely she's not going to answer that.

  “Every now and then James and I like to go to a nice restaurant, but most of the time we don’t leave before we find an empty closet or an empty restroom.”

  “Aunt Grace!” Elena’s eyes are the size of dinner plates.

  “You young girls are not the only ones that like to have fun. Your Uncle James is quite the man.” She smiles at us.

  “Okay, stop,” Elena tells her.

  “Your turn, Chica.”

  “Oh, no. I do not want to hear about her and my brother having sex,” I tell them.

  “Oh, yes, I want to hear how the big, sexy cowboy makes her toes curl,” Aubrey says.

  All I can do is make a gagging noise. This is a part of my brother's life I could live without.

  “Well, he did tie me up with my underwear once and ate ice cream off of me all night,” Elena tells us blushing from head to toe.

  “I would let him eat whatever he wanted off me. That is one hot stripper,” Aubrey tells Elena.

  I have no idea what they are talking about, but they both start laughing.

  “You keep your slutty hand off of my future husband,” Elena says.

  “That’s fine; you said the little brother was bigger.” She winks at me.

  “Oh no! You two can both stop. We are not going to talk about both of my brothers and their sex life. Nope. Not happening. I will already have to live with that story for the rest of my life, thanks for that by the way,” I say to Elena and she just blows me a kiss.

  “Okay Sarah, what about you?” Crap, I knew this was coming. And now my face is bright red.

  “I don’t want to play.” I try to go back into my dressing room. To hide from the questions of why I haven't had sex yet? The question, what am I waiting for? It's all too much.

  “Come on, you have to have the craziest sex story.” Aubrey smiles at me, and I just shake my head. This is humiliating.

  “Okay, best orgasm?” She looks excited to hear the dirty details, but there are none. How do you tell complete strangers you have never had an orgasm, heck you’ve never had sex?

  I don’t say anything, and the quiet is unsettling. I look over my shoulder, and all eyes are on me. Grace looks at me with a sweet smile, Aubrey's eyes look like they might pop out of her head, and Elena looks like she wants to ask the one thing I don’t want her to.

  Were you saving yourself for him?

  I don’t think I can answer that right now. At first, yes, I was hoping Wyatt would be my first, my everything. Then no, I was moving on and trying to find my happiness. It was just too hard not to compare every other man to him.

  “Wait, wait, wait just a damn minute. You are telling me you have never had your bell rung?” Aubrey looks mortified that I have never had ‘my bell rung’ as she so delicately put it. So, I just shrug my shoulders like it’s no big deal.

  “Not even when you masturbate? You do flip your bean, right?” She is like a dog with a bone; she will not let this go. I want this entire conversation to end, or the floor to open up and suck me in.

  Elena steps out of the dressing room in a new dress, and we all go quiet. Thank God for a beautiful distraction, as everyone's eyes are on her and away from my pathetic life.

  “I think this is it,” she says in a whisper.

  We all stand there watching her in the mirror, turning and admiring the beautiful fitted lace with cap sleeves. My favorite thing is the open keyhole back, with a slim underskirt and sweep train. She looks amazing.

  Aunt Grace lo
oks at her with so much love. Elena turns to us with tears in her eyes.

  “Do you think Lucas will like it?” she asks me.

  “Do you like it?” I ask her.

  “I love it, but I want him to love it too.”

  “He will love anything you are in because he loves you, Elena.” She pulls me in for a hug telling how much she loves Lucas, me, and my family.

  “We all love you too.”

  Today was a long day, with driving to Seattle, then shopping all day for dresses. Elena decided on purple for our dresses, and we each got to choose our own style. Mine is a slim fit V-neck that stops right at my knees. I love it.

  We say our goodbyes to Aubrey, who promised to come visit Elena soon. We are only in the car for a few minutes before Elena leaned over and asked if I wanted to talk about it. I shake my head, and she let me know she is here when I need her.

  After getting back to Grace’s house, I'm too tired and excuse myself to my room. Plus, this will give Elena some alone time with her family. I take a long shower and change into my bed clothes, the second my head hits the pillow I'm out.

  Chapter 11

  Wyatt

  I think this last week might be my worst one yet. I had been helping Lucas with the ranch, but my head was somewhere else. All I could think about was the wedding shower. Sarah telling me to leave her alone, that she needed space. So, I gave her what she wanted, I will always give her what she wants. Even at the cost of my own sanity.

  Saturday hit, and I was about to crawl out of my own skin. All I kept picturing was the look she gave me like I was some kind of monster. I know I went too far when Brad opened his mouth, but all I wanted was to protect her. Even if it was just from name calling.

  I am a monster though, and I forget that this isn't war and I don’t always have to act like a soldier. I spent four years fighting in a place that would put the fear of God in most men. Always being on guard and never knowing who you can trust. Wondering if today was the day they send you home in a wood box. The guys that surrounded me, the men and women wearing the same uniform I did, they were the only people I could truly count on.